SOLVE THE WORST CASE SCENARIO.
“What’s the worst thing that could happen?” Some individuals engage in this type of thinking automatically and regularly. They identify a possible problem, immediately imagine the worst possible outcome, and then become stuck in that fearful feeling without resolution. Any worry that remains unresolved will be left to grow in the depths of their subconscious mind. Over time, this can produce various anxiety disorders, and affect their physical. The adaptive version of this thinking goes more like this, “What’s the worst thing that could happen, and what could I do in that case?”
Here is the alternative and adaptive method:
1. Identify the fear feeling.
2. Identify the fearful thought.
3. Apply the cognitive challenge for fear.
4. If appropriate, identify the worst-case scenario.
5. Then, identify possible solutions. The vast majority of problems encountered in life are not life threatening, and have effective solutions. The solutions oftentimes involve dealing with uncomfortable feelings, change, or confronting the object of fear which may be essentially what the ego wants to avoid.
6. As you identify a solution(s), make a solid mental note of it, or better yet, write it down including any plan of external action. With this or any other feeling solution, you will only experience a reduction of feeling if you believe what you are telling yourself. To the extent that you can commit your realistic solution to memory and/or take action you will effectively reduce your fear and potential for anxiety or future panic attacks.
This resolution might be developed into an ongoing list or journal of worry resolution. It may be of great service to your over-stimulated brain and nervous system to essentially remove these worries from your everyday thinking and write them down on paper. Writing down worries seems to be a magical process, transforming subjective brain activity into objective reality. In this form, worries are much easier to deal with. You can describe them using as much detail and depth as you wish, which can help you to see them realistically. Also, you can now begin the next two critical steps of brainstorming potential solutions for each worry, and then prioritizing the order in which you will begin to address and resolve them.
BACK IT UP.
Make a backup plan, also known as a contingency plan. Let’s say that you have come up with a great strategy for resolving a problem that has been causing you to be fearful or to worry. However, even the greatest of plans are not guaranteed. This resolution suggests having at least one additional solution to employ in the case that some unforeseen event prevents your first solution from working. “If not plan A, then plan B.” Your may even want to create more than one contingency plan. This solution can really provide some peace of mind.
BREAK IT UP. (Procrastination Part 2)
“I’m afraid I’ll do a bad job.” Again, the feeling origin of procrastination could be based in either anger or fear. Procrastination Part 1 was about the anger of not liking a task and then avoiding it. Here procrastination as a behavior is seen as the avoidance of a certain feared task outcome. This resolution is virtually the same. Again, many tasks can be broken down into a number of smaller, organized and prioritized tasks. At some point, the smaller tasks become less frightening, and therefore more approachable. So, when you are facing what appears to be a task with potentially dangerous outcomes of gigantic proportions, and your “I’m afraid of what might happen” fearful thinking has brought you to a screeching halt, remember—think “BOP’EM”: break it down, organize it, prioritized it, and ego mix it up. Then celebrate the completion of each small victory toward the big victory at the end.
CREATE WIN - WIN SITUATIONS.
To reduce fear about a bad outcome, try creating your own win-win strategy. In this resolution to fear, you create two separate outcomes that are both favorable to you. These outcomes are non-ego in nature, and in Your Own Best Interest (p. 76 WGPMBC). To the extent that you genuinely like either outcome, this can be an extremely effective method of fear reduction. For example, let’s say you are unhappy in your job because you don’t like your immediate supervisor, and you feel you should be paid more. You might avoid doing anything about it because of your fear that you don’t want to “rock the boat” and you need to continue to earn a living. Creating a win-win outcome means that you begin looking for another job on your own time. When you find one that you believe you would like, and that pays what you believe you are worth, you ask for an offer of intent in writing. You then ask your current employer for the changes that you believe are realistic, reasonable, and relationally fair. In your mind, you know that you have a win-win outcome. You set up the circumstances so that either you get the changes you want, or you accept the job offer that you have in writing and would like. Regardless of how the current employer responds, you win either way.
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